I was chatting (gchatting, that is) with a friend not too long ago and I recalled a nice birthday gift I had received from my Ex before he was my Ex. I told my friend that I should remember these things because one day Monster will want to know about them. To know about how our relationship was before it wasn’t one anymore. So in an effort to record and preserve history, here’s a list of some of the nice things Monster’s dad did for me when we were together.
For my birthday one year, he got me the movie Waitress on DVD. He even found a recipe for one of the pies in the movie and made it for me.
When I was in the hospital trying not to have our baby, he made me a playlist of relaxing songs.
He sent flowers to my work on the day I handed in my resignation for what I thought would be a better job and then he sent me an Edible Arrangement when I went back to work there.
He introduced me to Veronica Mars and we laid on the couches one winter weekend to watch all three seasons on DVD.
When my dad was visiting due to some health problems, he picked him up from the hospital and took him to put a deposit down on a temporary apartment.
Without his help I wouldn’t have Monster. So no matter how much he pisses me off, I can never hate him. He’s Monster’s dad for better or for worse.
I speak to my step twins’ mom fairly regularly and am always shocked by how much hostility she still holds toward the Ex. I don’t want that resentment trickling down to Monster. He will make up his own mind about his father and I want it to be based on their relationship, not my feelings. I think one of the best things I can do for Monster is give his dad a clean slate. Navigating your own feelings toward your parents is tough enough without being stained by someone else’s too.